There was a time in my life where I would wake up at 5am everyday and hit the ground running. This was when I was in college and part of a number of sports teams where my sole joy and purpose of waking up was to practice and play a great game with my teammates.
This is a time which I reflect upon often as I am no longer that person. The person that woke up at 5am to excercise.
It was a strong nostalgic feeling where I thought to myself – “ah! The good ol days”
This feeling was also coupled with a feeling of sadness. Not because I miss those days, but because I was no longer that 5am person.
And that is when I put a lot of pressure on myself to go back to being that person.
Years have come and gone where I have tried to wake up at 5am and work out. And if I didn’t do it, I got upset with myself.
Years like this have gone by and one day I decided to wake up and get out. This was roughly 2 years ago. I made a plan with my friends to go to Cubbon park and “work out”.
Knowing that people were waiting for me drove me to wake up and follow through with the plan.
We went to the park, beautiful, serene and green 🍃 and worked out.
And I was happy, but I realised my happiness didn’t come from the excercise, but from the time spent with the people I love and the peace that came from standing on a bed of grass amongst the trees.
It was in that moment that I realised that although working out was a good habit, calming my mind was more important. Giving myself some credit was more important and in that peace, attaining happiness.
I realised that I could work out, but I needed to help my mind first. My priorities had changed with my life.
I work in a corporate office in a concrete jungle of a city. Its easy to get swallowed in the chaos of it all. Long stressful hours in the offices and commuting across the city takes it toll, on my mind and in turn my body.
It’s in these moments of sadness and self contemplation where I realised that, although I live in a concrete jungle, I needed to find my “Cubbon park moment” again.
I couldn’t keep traveling back to my hometown to sit in that park every time I was upset.
I need to bring that moment of happiness into my daily life.
Coming back to that 5am wake up call and this video of my morning view . (Sound on)https://kukielovesbacon.files.wordpress.com/2018/06/img_9387-1.mov
I now wake up early(try to achieve that 5am call) between 6-7am, not with the sole aim of working out, but to have my Cubbon park moment. To stop, look out into my surroundings, close my eyes, take deep breaths and listen to that sound of nature. Open my eyes to look at the beautiful plants around me and be at peace.
That small moment of peace that I created for myself helped me to get in touch with myself, gain perspective and most importantly, not to be hard on myself. This is a lesson I carry with me wherever I go.
It’s still a work in progress but it’s definitely on its way.
I hope you find your tiny moments of peace too.